Explore Spirituality

Discover How Spirituality and Better Health Are Connected

Use spirituality as a tool

Some people say they're spiritual; some go to church regularly. But the real test of your spirituality is to apply it skillfully when you need it to solve real-life issues. That is, can you think before you act? Can you use things such as deep breathing, meditation, and prayer to help you be humble, compassionate, and empathetic when you're under high stress or when you have a family crisis? That ability and skill is really at the heart of what transcendence is all about. So what do you do? It means doing things like counting to 10 before overreacting with emotion in an argument with a partner or family member. It means slowing down the thought process so you're really thinking through problems and conflicts. It means asking yourself not what your spiritual leader of choice would do about a conflict but what he or she would feel about this challenge. You want to tap into your heart more than control a behavior. And it means taking an issue one step further than its surface-level solution. So, for example, if a child is starting to get bad grades at school, find out what else is going on in the child's life.

Be a better believer

Funny to hear it said that way -- you can be a better believer in the same way you can be a better chef. Here are five ways that can help you become more open and aware:

• Be curious; ask questions, and try to distinguish between facts and opinion.
• Know that beliefs are different from knowledge, which is often different from reality. You can't live your life totally blinded by a system of beliefs; you have to integrate them with the world around you. That is, belief is one part of life -- but it's not the only thing.
• Learn from others, and ask about their beliefs -- open yourself up to new possibilities.
• Manage stress to avoid damage to the hippocampus, the part of your brain that helps regulate emotion, memory, and other systems needed for maintaining healthy beliefs. Say only positive thoughts out loud.
• Fill your glass up if it's half empty. Optimism, simply put, is healthier than pessimism. In a study, nuns judged optimistic based on essay answers 40 years prior to death lived about 8 years younger (longer and with less disability) than the nuns whose essays were judged to reflect pessimism.
• Don't judge others too harshly. After all, as long as no one is being hurt, if they derive joy from their beliefs and you don't, who is better off?

Create rituals

One of the reasons why church, music, and prayer can be such an uplifting experience is that the weekly rituals reinforce a sense of community. You can experience those spiritual highs by attending church, but you can also do it through other rituals, such as nature walks with a group of people in your neighborhood or an annual trip with your family or a nightly dinnertime routine during which each person shares one wonderful thing that happened to him or her that day. Rituals also reinforce behaviors (smokers are reminded of this every time someone taps the top of a pack of cigarettes).